Any day above ground is a good one

I’m mad at my dog, her name is Ginger and I have had her for almost 8 years now. She is a yellow Labrador retriever and I have had her since she was a puppy. Up to today I have felt that she was a very very good dog. But now I am not so sure. I am told that she is a great dog by many of my friends. Many of who have expressed that they would want a dog just like her. I have worked very hard in training her. I have used a clicker to train her and it has worked pretty well. She will do just about anything I ask her to do. She will sit and stay, lie down, come to me, heel. She just LOVES her Frisbee and would do anything to play a game of catch with me. She loves the water almost as much.

So why am I mad at her? Well I have always been under the impression that dogs were man’s best friends. By my definition that would mean that she would do anything for me. Well that is hardly true. She still will not go to the fridge and get me a beer. I ask her all of the time and she just sits there and looks at me.

Then she goes and gets her Frisbee. Does that mean she doesn’t care, is she self-centered? I would really like a beer though.

I ask her all of the time not to get in the lake. But does she listen to me? NO!

When I am outside she bugs the crap out of me with her Frisbee. Even when I say NO. Well there is always the stick.

She insists on going on car rides with me along with her friend and gives me no money for gas or anything. She just sits there and talks with her friend.

But what I am really pissed about is that she didn’t detect my Prostate Cancer. Other dogs do it. In fact MANY dogs do it. Cocker spaniels do it. They even have a Poodle in on the action. They detect all kinds of cancer, prostate cancer, bladder cancer and kidney cancer. But noooo, not my dog. Why can’t my dog be more like the other dogs?

We are going to have to change our training program. Sniff here Ginger, sniff here…… Good dog…… Oh my God there is a dog in my pants!!