Any day above ground is a good one

October 31, 2005

Trick Or Treat

Filed under: My Cancer Story — Dan @ 4:34 pm

Both Paula and myself are very nervous, she has notes and I can barely focus, we are in an exam room. Dr. Jeffrey B. Starling walks in and kida sprawls out on a stool on wheels. He looks at Paula, she is shaking, and says: ” Look at you there with your notes and internet print-outs. You must know more than I, tell me is he going to live or is he going to die.” We are in shock how could someone especially a Doctor giving someone some the worst information they will receive in their life act like that? What an insensitive jerk. He gives us an unreadable copy of my biopsy results and proceeds to read off the results of each core.

Right Apex, demonstrates moderately-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+3=6, measuring 0.3mm and comprising 1% of the tissue.

Paula asks for clarification. He drones on.

Right Mid, demonstrates moderately to poorly-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+4=7, measuring 6mm and comprising 30% of the tissue.

Another question.

Right Base, demonstrates moderately-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+3=6, measuring 1mm and comprising 4% of the tissue.

And another question, Paula’s voice is breaking up.

Right Lateral Apex, demonstrates moderately to poorly-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+4=7, measuring 10mm and comprising 100% of the tissue.

I can’t focus, all I see is adenocarcinoma, Carcinoma, CANCER.

Right Lateral Mid, demonstrates moderately to poorly-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+4=7, measuring 7mm and comprising 80% of the tissue.

I go into a fog

Right Lateral Base, demonstrates moderately-differentiated adenocarcinoma, Gleason score 3+3=6, measuring 4mm and comprising 50% of the tissue.

Dream like I hear Paula clarifying something.

Left Apex, demonstrates small focus of atypical.

I can only think CANCER it is the first time I have seen it on paper. This is real now.

Left Mid, demonstrates benign prostatic glands and stroma.

CANCER

Left Base, demonstrates benign prostatic glands and stroma.

CANCER

Left Lateral Apex, demonstrates benign prostatic glands and stroma.

Paula keeps asking questions to verify what our very bad copy of the report said. She was shaking he was curt. I had to ask what my options were and then he very quickly spewed out my options with very little explanation of what they were or what the impact of each was. He scheduled a bone scan and we leave.

I drive directly to Tower to schedule the scan.

The bottom line is that half of my prostate sampled for cancer some at a higher percentage than others. I have a predominate Gleason score of 3+4=7 which means my cancer is moderately aggressive. The tissue is scored on a scale of 1 to 5 in terms of how aggressive it is. The first number in the score is the type of tissue that is most prevalent and the second number is the type of tissue that next most prevalent. You add the two together and you have your score. You can have a Gleason score of 2 to 10.

I have been trying to understand why Starling was so rude and uncaring, the only conclusion is that he was either intimidated that we were actively participating in what most would understand to be the most important decision of ones life. Both Paula and I are researchers and to us the Internet is a wonderful tool. Starling told us no less than three times not to get on the Internet “it will just confuse you”. Well he was wrong it enlightens me to all of my treatment options and ALL of the side effects. Starling was probably also mad that we were requesting that I get a 12 needle biopsy vs. a 6 or 8 needle biopsy. I am sure that he perceived this as his little fiefdom. Sorry buddy it is my body and you are the hired help. Starling was also irritated that we had already scheduled a second opinion with Moffit before the biopsy was even done at his office. My retort to that is plan for the worse hope for the best or too bad so sad. I think the real reason he was so rude was he realized that he could not manipulate Paula or myself. He is after all a surgeon so if he can’t convince me that surgery is the way to go then he doesn’t make the $$$ on my misfortune. As I left that day I saw a couple of Spanish speaking men with their families, a couple of older men, none of who I would think would do the research to find out about this cancer nor do I think they would stand up to him and disagree.

“OK doc you say cut it out then cut is out is fine with me”

Little do these poor men know that they will most likely be impotent than not and most likely have urinary incontinence than not, because of the surgery. I think he is more interested in his bottom line and has very little interest in the quality of my life after his work is done. So he is fired, gone, bye bye.

14 Comments

I’m glad that you ditched that doc–what an ass! if you have to go on this journey against cancer, it’s important to have people that you like along for the ride.

Comment by amanda — December 6, 2005 @ 9:46 am
[…] Check out Any Day Above Ground Is A Good One. Dan’s Trick or Treat story get’s to the heart of an all too common relationship between surgeon and (potential) patient. […]

Comment by Real Cancer, Real Lives — December 6, 2005 @ 12:03 pm
Cancer is gruelling enough without having an ass of a doctor against you.. I am so sorry that he was so horrid to you and Paula.. I hope you have found someone a lot more sympathetic…

Minerva

Comment by Minerva — December 6, 2005 @ 4:19 pm
Dan, this story absolutely blew me away. My wife and I have experienced some truly terrible bed-side manner in the three years we’ve been dealing with cancer, but this guy has to take the cake.

Seriously…I’m impressed you didn’t take him out with a right-hook.

Hang in there, my friend. And thanks again for letting us include your story in Real Cancer, Real Lives

Comment by Cary — December 6, 2005 @ 4:51 pm
It must be a Moffit thing, Dan. My friend, Tom Rinaldi, was undergoing treatment there for brain cancer. When his regular doctor was on vacation, the “substitute” doctor mentioned that the tumor was still growing. HUH? It seems his regular doctor had neglected to mention this for the past few months. What’s with these guys, anyway?

Tom is now going to the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville.

Comment by Mike — December 12, 2005 @ 9:42 am
I am happy to say Mike that this was not a Moffit thing. As far as I know Dr. S has no affiliation with Moffit. I think he is only with University Community. I didn’t go with Moffit because I had poor care or treatment. Quite the contrary, they were nice and very professional and I felt that had I chosen them I would have been fine with their care. I went with Dr. Dattoli in Sarasota quite simply because he is the VERY best at what he does in his field. I have had many friends including my sister-in-law go to Moffit. They are all still kicking. But that doesn’t excuse what happened to your friend. Thanks for the post.

Comment by Dan — December 12, 2005 @ 10:32 am
I have had a similar diagnosis: 3+4. What has been you treatment so far? and what have the results been.

Abe.

Comment by Abe Damon — April 17, 2006 @ 1:06 am
Abe,

Thanks for stopping by my blog. My entire history is on the blog but the short version as of today is; I am almost 4 weeks post seeding with some urinary symptoms. At the end of June I will have 8 additional IMRT radiation treatments and at that time I will get my PSA tested again. It is too soon to test my PSA due to the fact that radiation will influence the test. So my wait continues…

Good luck to you.

d

Comment by Dan — April 17, 2006 @ 9:07 am
Been diagnosed Gleason 3+3=6.Read lots of stuff on the net (confused).Sent for a bone scan 74 years old.Have
50 year old girlfriend.Scared …less.Open to suggestions.

Comment by Andrew — May 4, 2006 @ 3:14 am
Andrew,

You are doing the right thing right now, getting educated. Your Gleason is lower than my 3+4=7. I would suggest that you get on one of the Prostate mailing list at http://groups.prostate-help.org/grsubsc.htm or at http://www.prostatepointers.org/seedpods/. Remember that prostate cancer grows fairly slowly so take a breath and do your homework to find the very best doctor you can find with the procedure that you are comfortable with. Hang in there and good luck!

Comment by Dan — May 4, 2006 @ 5:00 pm
My doctor gave me my diagnosis over the phone and told me to make an appointment
to discuss the results.

Comment by steven solomon — June 19, 2006 @ 5:24 pm
Welcome to the blog Steven. While I wouldn’t want to have the news broken to me that way I am pretty sure that I would want the news ASAP! So be it then if it is by phone. This doctor was mocking us with his statements and insecurity. It as you know it is bad enough to get the "news" and deal with it. In my case having some insecure Doctor mocking you at the same time made it hurt all the more. Thanks for dropping by.

d

Comment by Dan — June 19, 2006 @ 6:59 pm
My husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer September 7,2007. Since then
he has had an orchiectomy. He is scheduled to start radiation treatment in
January. He is so bothered with hot flashed. It doesn’t seem as if you were
bothered much with hot flashes. His are worse than any I have every heard of.
He doesn’t sleep because he has 4 or 5 every night. Thank you for any
suggestions.
J.

Comment by Jane Varner — November 3, 2007 @ 4:54 pm
My name is keith, I also am having hot flashes,I always thought it was from my heart surgery in 2003. Now in 2008, they said i have prostate cancer, a gleason score of 3+3=6. I also went to Dr. Starling, he made it seem quite serious and that he wanted to operate. So I got a 2nd opinion at the moffitt center. They said I ought not to be worried and that the cancer was in the early stage. I have decided to have the radiation prostate seed implant at the end of June, 2008.

Comment by keith — May 16, 2008 @ 6:52 pm